we give ourselves permission to let go,
Don’t wait until life settles down; you are not going to get less busy.
Happy New Year,
“The opposite of Life is not Death. The opposite of Death is Birth. Life has no Opposite.” Unknown
Death and Birth are Bookends of Life.
Death is a Rite of Passage that brings a family of initiatory emotions: grief, anger, terror, rage, disappointment, sadness.
But of all these, Grandmother Grief leads the way. She calls forth an Initiation that renews, heals and cleanses our souls.
“Dealing with “the things we cannot escape” (but want to or try to) is best accomplished within the sacred space of ritual. Ritual facilitates and provides us with a unique channel to access higher power. Certain issues don’t want to be resolved mechanistically. We don’t have to know how the power works; we just have to show up and let the higher forces deal with the issues. Ritual provides a safe place for the soul and body to affirm life over death, to affirm continuity over discontinuity.” Maladoma Some’
In our last Sacred Doula program, our graduating class designed and experienced a very powerful grief ritual so that all of our incomplete losses and their stories could be shared and released. We prepared ourselves for this ritual in many ways.
The night before, we wrote about a powerful loss and how it had affected us. We created a healing space in the room to honor these loses. We invited a wonderful musician to sing and play guitar.
We asked elders from our community to attend and support us. We wore beautiful white, blue or black clothes. Before we entered the space we were cleansed with special smoke and marked our faces with charcoal tears. We entered this space with sacred intent.
We placed beautiful scarves, fabric, flowers, candles, and photos of our loved ones on the table. And as each individual shared their story of love and loss, we listened with compassion and tears. We ended many hours later filled with awe and love. Our spirits and bodies were refreshed and renewed.
This grief ritual transformed us individually and created a strong caring healing community that we can trust in and rely on. It gives us reference for how to show up for others who will be in our care.
Here are some of my thoughts from my studies on grief and death and from my personal experience from this day.
Grandmother Grief gives us a way back into our own heart. It is precisely because we love so much that we have the opportunity for a greater human experience…. an opportunity to be initiated into greater inner harmony, unity with our own heart, memory of our innate healing gifts and ancient wisdom, and to be re-affirmed in love with all our relations.
Because we love so deeply, even if that love and care may be temporarily covered over in resentments or conflicts, it can still give rise to new life. It can provide opportunity to re-fine, re-kindle, re-move, re-store, shake us free of locked and held feelings. It can rejoin us with the truth of love and the memory of who we are.
Becoming a Sacred Passage Doula supports everyone to live fully and completely through end of life. Ha.Le’ is hosting a 2 day Introduction to Sacred Passage Doula Training on Aug 28 & 29.
-Tarron Estes July 2015
Founder, Conscious Dying Institute
Learn more about the Sacred Passage workshop on our Events Page
Enroll in the Workshop ($150, early registration price $135 ends Aug 7th)
Restorative Yoga uses blankets, pillows, and other props to allow the body to fully and comfortably relax into each pose, often resting in each pose for 3 or more minutes. Through these fully supported body positions, breath awareness, and meditative contemplation, Restorative Yoga restores a deep sense of calm relaxation to the body and mind. Every effort is made by the teacher to assist the student in finding comfort in each position. Transitions between poses happen slowly, with ease and awareness. The body’s comfortable, supported postures allow the mind to begin the process of unwinding.
Due to the continuous influx of stimuli in our daily lives, most of us live in a constant state of alertness. Where this behavior does keep us from being eaten by tigers, falling off of cliffs, and other such peril, it also creates a state of continuous mental, physical and emotional stress. As the body recognizes the sensation of full support and the lack of imminent danger, the mind is unburdened of physical concerns and able to refine focus on the breath.
In Restorative Yoga, as in other styles of yoga, we use the breath as a link between the conscious and the unconscious. We can both choose to control our breath as well as surrender to the natural process of breathing. Thus, focus on our breath and the experience of breathing begins to bring us truly into the present moment, into what our body and mind can sense right now, removing focus on exterior stresses and daily concerns and allowing the nervous system much deserved rest.
With the physical body fully supported and the nervous system functioning with ease we have the opportunity to explore even deeper states of relaxation. The meditative states achieved through Restorative yoga practice are often more restful than an average night’s sleep. This rested state of mind and body is where we put together the puzzle pieces we’ve picked up throughout our conscious daily life. This is where we establish patterns and where we create memories.
A regular Restorative Yoga practice is a powerful tool for those interested in improving the health of the mind, the body, and their vast network of interconnectivity. With the guidance of a knowledgeable teacher, Restorative Yoga is available and beneficial to students of all level, including those completely new to yoga, recovering from injury, seasoned practitioners of any style, on its own or as a complement to any strong practice.
At a recent evening Vinyasa Yoga class, I experienced a good, old fashioned “yoga cry”. It felt great. I didn’t try to push it aside or act like it wasn’t happening. I didn’t care that everyone else could see. Okay, maybe I did a little bit. But, in the car, on the ride home, I let the tears flow freely. I felt myself releasing and opening. I felt clearer.
I was not new to this experience. Early on in my practice, I had cried often in class. But I was blessed with a knowledgeable and compassionate instructor who helped me to understand the effects that yoga asanas can have on the subtle body. He explained that the purpose of the asanas is spiritual transformation and that yoga is not just another gimmicky workout. But mostly, he left me alone to process my own experience.
My recent sob on the mat helped me to better understand the yoga catchphrases of “honoring my practice” and “listening to my body”. I felt a surge of gratitude—realizing that yoga is always available, that it allows me to give and take as needed. I honor my practice by coming back to it again and again.
Emily Davidson Nemoy is elated to be teaching Rise and Shine! Slow Flow Vinyasa Yoga on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 7:15 AM at Ha.Le’. In Slow Flow Vinyasa Yoga, movement is synchronized with the breath. We purposefully move at a slower pace so that the practitioner has time to mentally engage with the body, understanding when a pose should be modified. A morning yoga series is a great option for working folks who need to get their practice in before the rest of their day begins. Emily loves teaching and practicing in the morning when the mind is clearer, making it easier to be more focused and mindful.
How would you answer this question, “What is the most important question you have ever been asked?” (and your answer CANNOT be “Will you marry me?”). Over 8 years ago, as I sat as a student in a class called Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), I was asked such a question. The Instructor (now Mentor) asked, “Is your mind a good friend or does it take you into bad neighborhoods?” Needless to say, my mind was screaming, “NO I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND AND NEVER WILL BE”. Now, 8 years later, I can say with certainty that my mind was only giving me bad advice. Below are ten (10) insights that have emerged since making mindfulness a daily practice. Read them and ask yourself, “Is your mind a good friend?”:
This is more than just self-awareness or knowing you like dark chocolate more than you like milk chocolate. It is about knowing your DNA, i.e. knowing your purpose, what you value, and what is never compromised.
Someone once said the most important choice we ever make in this life for personal happiness is who or if to marry. And it is less about finding the right person than it is about being the right person.
Resentment is like eating rat poison and expecting the rat to die. Regret is holding on to a hope of having a better past. Letting go is not shooting a second arrow after you have been stung with the first one.
If we are looking for faults, we will see faults. If we are looking for the good in someone, we will see only the good. What we seek, we will surely find.
Yes, even all of you extroverts. You don’t have to be like Thoreau at Walden Pond to take periodic refuge without the presence of others. When you lose touch with your inner stillness, you lose touch with yourself.
Showing up means being present with others, i.e. being HERE NOW not somewhere else in your head.
I was once told that when you get in a hurry, you run off and leave more than you ever catch up to. I never quite understood what that meant, but I have run off and left many precious gifts that were only waiting for my patience to arrive.
Nothing also meaning “no one”. Clinging, craving and attachment are the core elements of 99% of all human suffering. The heart and mind function like a parachute…they only work when open.
Rilke said it best when writing, “Let everything happen to you, the beauty and the terror. Just keep going. No thought or feeling is final.” This is the Law of Impermanence.
Smile more, complain less, & never give up.
-by Elmo Shade
Elmo offers meditation and qigong classes, mindfulness workshops for adults and teens, and individualized mindfulness coaching.
Massage therapy for older adults is a promising way to help them retain health and independence.
Older adults who received an hour-long massage once a week for six weeks showed significant improvements in balance, neurological and cardiovascular measures. In the recent study, 35 volunteers were randomly assigned to the massage group or a control group.
Those who received massage therapy had lower blood pressure and more stability immediately after the sessions, an hour after and even a week after the regimen ended.
The participants were healthy volunteers aged 58 to 68 who were recruited through brochures and posters in medical offices, libraries, stores, fitness facilities and by word-of-mouth in and around Birmingham, Alabama. People with a history of chronic disease that affected balance, heart health or nervous system function were not eligible to participate.
Each person in the treatment group received a standard, 60-minute massage therapy protocol once a week for six consecutive weeks. The study, published in 2012, is especially significant because most prior research examined the effects of a single session.
Older adults need options to help them stay independent and active, and massage may be a great non-pharmaceutical approach. Falls, many of them debilitating if not fatal, occur in one of every three adults 65 and older. Health care costs associated with falls alone are expected to reach $32 billion by 2020, according to a 2009 study.
Multiple factors contribute to falls among older adults, including visual system influences, balance impairment, and cardiovascular and neurological conditions. Falls break hips and arms, cause head injuries, and contribute to decline in quality of life.
Even bruising and emotional trauma from a fall can make someone more hesitant – and lack of confidence can compound the risk of additional incidents. Trying to compensate for muscle imbalances, pain and new or old injuries often actually cause the fall.
We already know massage therapy reduces pain and improves clients’ sense of well being. This study suggests that regular massage for older adults can do far, far more.
The study by JoEllen M. Sefton, Ceren Yarar and Jack W. Berry, Neuromechanics Research Laboratory, Department of Kinesiology, Auburn University, AL, and Department of Psychology, Samford University, Birmingham, AL, was published in the September 2012 issue of the InternatIonal Journal of TherapeutIc Massage and Bodywork.
Cupping therapy is a form of deep massage, affecting the body up to four inches into the tissues. Using heat or suction, cupping massage creates a partial vacuum that helps tissues release toxins, activate and clear blood vessels and promote local healing.
This is another ancient healing art that both mobilizes blood flow and opens the meridians, or energy conduits, of the body. Cupping is considered the most effective way of opening five important meridians down the back. Invigorating energy flows through the body once these meridians are open.
With cupping therapy Nashville clients tap into old traditions. Ancient Egyptian, Chinese, and Middle Eastern cultures all used cupping therapy, and references in hieroglyphics from 3,500 years ago refer to the procedure. Throughout history, healers used bamboo, hollowed out animal horns, seashells, nuts and gourds. Earthenware and metal cups preceded the development of glass.
Therapists today use cups made of medical silicone or plastic, some with pumps and some that incorporate magnetic therapy. Modern versions increase drawing strength while decreasing potential side effects and simplifying the procedure.
Most traditional massage therapy uses positive pressure and compression to manipulate tissues. Cupping uses negative pressure, stretching tissue from underlying structures. It greatly complements myofascial release, deep tissue work and manual lymphatic drainage.
Among the benefits of cupping therapy:
– Loosens adhesions
– Draws blood supply to the skin
– Moves stagnation and drains fluids
– Relieves inflammation
– Breaks up and congestion
– Promotes lymphatic fluid drainage
– Stretches muscle and connective tissues
With more people seeking alternatives, interest in holistic healing methods like cupping therapy is on the rise. At Ha.Le’ Mind and Body, we utilize both moving cups and stationary cupping methods. Depending on client needs and preferences, we will blend cupping therapy with other approaches.
Our clients who struggle with pain related to scar tissue report improved range of motion, and less pain after such sessions. If you’d like to know how cupping therapy may be of benefit, please give us a call at 615-414-0242 or contact us HaLeMindandBody.com.
Fibromyalgia is a frustrating syndrome.
People with fibromyalgia suffer from generalized pain, rigid joints and at times overwhelming fatigue. Performing basic activities becomes difficult. Trigger points, or areas of intense tenderness, make matters worse, both physically and emotionally. Depression, with or without anxiety, is common.
Massage therapy for fibromyalgia symptoms makes intuitive sense but research backs the approach as well. Studies show myofascial release therapy can be especially helpful in relieving symptoms. In it, therapists palpate, pull and stretch soft tissue known as fascia that surrounds and separates muscle layers. Circulation increases and contracted muscles relax.
In a 2010 study, 64 myofascial patients were assigned to one of two groups. In one, patients received 90-minute weekly treatments for 20 weeks. In the second, patients received “sham” treatments -30 minutes with a magnetic therapy machine that was disconnected. They did not know the treatments were fake.
Researchers evaluated myofascial therapy’s effects on pain, anxiety, and quality of sleep and depression in fibromyalgia patients. Measurements at baseline, after 20 weeks and six months following the treatments showed myofascial therapy provided significant benefits.
The patients in that group experienced improved sleep and quality of life and reduced anxiety and pain — both immediately following the treatments and up to one month after. Six months after therapy, patients continued to report improvements in sleep.
The benefits did not extend to the control group.
The study was led by Adelaida Maria Castro-Sánchez at the University of Almería in Almería, Spain. She led a similar study in 2011 that examined more closely how fibromyalgia patients respond to massage therapy and found reductions in pain sensitivity to their pain, including some improvements that lasted as long as a year after the study was over.
Myofascial release is an effective alternative and complementary therapy for patients with fibromyalgia. Research as well as our own experience in Nashville with massage for fibromyalgia suggests regular sessions can make day-to-day living less painful, and more enjoyable. Watsu for fibromyalgia also is quite effective. Warm water alone helps our clients relax but gentle manipulations with a Watsu therapist can reduce pain and fatigue.
We’d love to tell you more.